Docs Diary

**kittykatty** · 11-01-2005, 06:14 AM

Hi ALL!!

The desire to be a doc has reared its ugly head again after my boyfriend has agreed to financially support me when i apply as long as i wait until he is earning enough to do so which means i may not be able to apply for another 3-5 years but it doesnt matter because its my dream and i feel its my destiny and i cant go on ignoring it.

Yes im very idle and havent been working hard enough in my current degree but hey ive managed to get a first last year overall and although the start to this year hasnt been working as well as i expected there is still time (i again left all semester 1 work til the very last minute and worked my arse off all night and morning and am awaiting the results anxiously - one thing about leaving work until the night before you havent got a clue whether what you did was bloody brilliant or really crap - you usually suspect the latter but often surprise yourself but i must admit i am very nervous about what the outcome will be! One thing i never do is check what ive done after i handed it in that would just be too stressful)

Anyway like i said there is time to pull myself together and continue to get a good degree classification. One thing that can be said is that i dont lack hospital experience. One thing about medical imaging is that you see everything cos youre the one who has to diagnose it in the first place whatever it may be.

This year has involved much more theatre and ward stuff which is quite useful. Although i havent at the moment got time to do anything impressive to add to my medical application im sure ill be able to do things once i graduate,

Debt situation is rising. Im currently on a par with the third world. Credid card = Around £2200 between them owed, Store cards = £400, Student account = £1290 overdrawn Student loan = £4500 owed to SLC. I darent even add up the total but at the moment i am somehow managing to earn around £250 a month which may not be much but its enough to keep up the repayments.

I cant wait to begin the medical application process and reading all you with yours really brings it home. I know it must be stressful but it must be very exciting too knowing that youre so close to going to medical school.

I wish you all the best! Hopefully youll all get in (i dont want you lot as my competition when i apply youre all too damn impressive!)

I cant post on the thread for 2005 applicants but ill list the stuff just so i can addto it throughout the coming years

female

21

GCSE grades: A*, AAAAAA, BBB (A* french, Bs in art ,design, maths)

A levels : AAAB

Medical schools applying to, Sheffield, Nottingham, Leeds, Hull York
(Im not bothered what bloody medschool i go to as long as i become a doctor at the end of the course im fairly adaptable as to how its taught so i apply to closest few to home so its drivable)

5th and 6th choices?
None, if i dont get in i apply again next year - already got a degree dont need another for the sake of it.

Any other information? (eg work exp, whatever)

Amnesty leader, Taught disabled kids to read, Visited various hospital departments on day visits (when deciding what the hell to do for a degree 1st time round) Clinical placement on degree working all hours god sends doing imaging - seen various operations on daily basis as part of this, visited the morgue and seen autopsy (dead bodies have x-rays too!) seen wards and how they work as part of degree, met various doctors and worked alongside them (realised that a lot of them are right cocky gits and am prepared for this suitably - realise being a med student will involve incurring more of this smug, cocky, arseholy attitude and dont mind this too much - am perfectly capable of desensitising myself to such things)

**kittykatty** · 14-01-2005, 05:00 AM

I bought yogalates today in an attempt to get a bit fitter but i got bored after 5 minutes and got myself a nice smarties chocolate egg to eat. mmmm im so glad the easter eggs have come out and the mini smarties ones are particularly nice!

I might try the yogalates again in a bit. It came with this rubber resistance band which is instrumental in the actual DVD but it makes you stink of rubber and i feel really uncomfortable smelling of rubber.

I cant be bothered I just wish i lived in that society where fatness was seen as beautiful and not the other way round. Not that i care what others think too much really but it just would be nice to be able to get away with wearing all types of clothes.

I put loads of my stuff on ebay because they either dont fit anymore or they look ridiculous on me

ops:

Anyway i dont care!

**kittykatty** · 02-02-2005, 05:23 AM

Havent done any yogalates i can tell you! I Have, however, developed a liking for pasta bake. Whilst i am very sure that pasta bake cant be good for you (grating half a big block of cheese on top of it really doesnt help) I can be rested in the thought that it does contain a fruitish kind of vegetable (tomato) and cheese has calcium so id even go so far as to say id developed a liking for a nice and healthy meal - except thats not true.

Hmm what else has happened??????

No results from uni yet. Still awaiting but am not hopeful.

Still want to be Doc -

I just wish my future husband didnt have such a boring name. Im pretty sure its just like TV? All your neighbours surely call you Dr whatever just cos youre a doctor instead of refering to you by your first name. Like on eastenders with dr trueman. If this is the case i really ought to get him to change his name by deed poll to something unusual. Hmmmm....ideas ideas? Dr Armand-Legg? Dr Frisbee? Dr Proctor? Dr Blood or Dr Bumhole? I need inspiration. Im not being blase about becoming a doctor i just have it all planned for that interview that i WILL get when i apply and they say: So, what made you decide to be a doctor? Well...my surname is Bumhole and i really feel it ought to be said out loud more by the general public and this is one way of forcing them to do so - followed by an evil laugh and all the interviewers will APPLAUD my evil plan (because all interviewers are evil themselves) Muhahahahahahahaha

Can you see now why i didnt apply when i was 18? Im not mature enough now and im in my 20s - what little hope i have.

**kittykatty** · 09-03-2005, 04:56 AM

God this degree is bloody hard when youre the most unorganised person in the entire world. At the moment i am sitting watching in fascination as my hamster tries to get up a vertical tube in its rotastak cage. It needs a ladder but everytime i put it one up it starts chewing on it and as its a nocturnal hamster this can get irritating at night.

Ill be honest i bought the hamsters on a whim and i shouldnt have. Im no good at caring for animals. I find them fascinating when theyre doing something interesting, but 'interesting' to me is generally not a pleasant time for them, for instance the endless struggle up a vertical plastic tube without grip, fitting amazing amounts of large peanuts in pouches until the head looks thrice the normal size, falling asleep on its wheel in exaustion.

I really should be getting some work done (or started as the case is at the minute!)

**kittykatty** · 16-03-2005, 05:54 AM

Have you ever felt thick?

Not just for a day, or a few minutes - but have you ever felt I am thick - thick in general?

No i doubt anyone on here has. I have though. I've decided that i am most definitely thick. I forget things so easily. I used to think that if i read a book on something id understand whatever it was about - eventually. I have realised now that it isnt true. I may understand something for a minute or two but after that it has gone - left my brain. I now realise that as i get older i am becoming more and more thick. I dont know whether im spelling words right anymore. Everything i do something i double check, just incase ive done it wrong or forgotten something. Its getting now so that im surprised if, when im double checking whether or not ive forgotten something, i have actually done it.

Its a shame, I really wanted to be a high flyer. Maybe a doctor some day - but if not i would have liked a managerial role. That isnt to be. I doubt ill even get this 'easy little pre-medical school' degree. If i do ill be surprised. If i get a 2:3 ill be surprised. There was a time when i would have expected a first and nothing lower but not anymore.

Oh well never mind. We cant all be clever. The world needs people like me so genuinely intelligent people can stand out. If they didnt stand out then they wouldnt get very far and its all relative, so my existence is justified by the fact that i am a low rung on which those higher can rank themselves above.

Its probably my own fault for being bone idle.

Let you be warned. Bone idleness leads to GENUINE loss of intelligence!

**kittykatty** · 22-03-2005, 03:45 AM

Still thick - its not wearing off!

Hmm what happened today. Can i remember?

Oh yes, vaguely.

I had an exam and then i went home and went to bed.

Then i woke up and went to work.

Then i realised i wasnt on the rota to work and went home.

Then i sat around thinking - damn i got that question wrong in the exam, and that one, and that one, in fact - are there any left that i could have possibly guessed right?

Then i sat around pondering.

Got a dissertation to do at some point, but it all seems so above me. Got to think of something to do it on too - something nice and easy....but what?

Thus is the life of a thicky.

**kittykatty** · 27-03-2005, 08:46 PM

I feel sick. I cant stop eating chocolate. Not the actual eggs, the sweets inside the eggs. Chocolate is poisonous to the system. Im nearing the poison limit i think - i must be. What is the limit for humans? I cant remember
21 tonnes comes to mind. Yep - definitely nearing it.

I got up at 2 today but thats ok cos it was really only 1, which doesnt sound as bad. Today has been a waste of a day - as are most days recently. Im off for study leave and so far the amount of study equates to nil. All my assignments are in when im on clinical placement when i dont have time to do any work, so in theory i should be working my bum off to get them done but somehow when the deadlines are weeks away it just seems in the distant future. Ill regret it when im staying up all night after a day of clinical placement.

So today i just sat around.

**kittykatty** · 24-04-2005, 11:12 PM

I cant cope. Its too hard. I dont like it.

No-one likes me. Everything i say comes out wrong and makes me sound unsociable or unpleasant. I dont like the degree Im doing. Im going to fail, but even if i pass im not going to enjoy the job.

I dread every day, unless its a saturday which is my only day off. I wish it was saturday every day. I hate work - no one likes me there and its too hard, i cant be bothered to talk to people but i have to talk to people or they wont like me.

I hope one day i look back on this and say ha ha how stupid was i, i must have been temporarily depressed or something.

I need some St Johns Wort - but i cant even stick to that routine cos im so forgetful and lazy.